Wah !! Applause, applause, etc.

Varied sources hint at an eye on upcoming Bihar polls, etc etc, collecting sops before elections and so on. As also is being said about the Shiv Sena and MNS raking up the Marathi Manoos issue just before its poll time in Mah. These are to me all side issues. Each party gets darned vocal about a cause they perceive as “close to populace” to get brownie points and steamroll at least a few candidates to power. Election systems over the world see various parties try various stunts and gimmics to get noticed and close to their “junta” prior to elections. And close the day of poll, louder the hullaballoo, disruption and so on.

Peaceful. Don’t want to change this.

What attracts my attention in this entire issue, is that of Rahul Gandhi, “scion” of the Congress Party of India, Leader through birth into the party leadership family, etc, decides to come out and say Mumbai is for all Indians. Again, while I laud this thought, I actually wonder why this man displays such an apparent case of hunting with the hounds and running with the hare. What am I talking about here?

I’m talking about article 370 of the Indian Constitution wrt Jammu & Kashmir. Read THIS to get a feel of what its all about.

To draw your attention to all that matters behind these verbose and possibly confusing terms, we are looking at just one glaring point. That the residents of Jammu & Kashmir live under a separate set of laws, including those related to citizenship, ownership of property, and fundamental rights, as compared to other Indians.

Granted by the Congress Party, during Indira Gandhi’s regime in the period 1974-1975.

Frankly, I have absolutely no idea about why this entire thing is still in force. The Congress Party has assured us time and again, that Kashmir was, is and will always be a part of India, and not be handed over to Pakistan, at any cost. It has assured us that Kashmir is like all other states, on par with any state with India, and that Indians have freedom to be a Kashmiri with full rights, blah blah blah !!

Whither then were they when Kashmiri Pandits were driven out by Mullahs there? Where are they now, when not a single Hindu can setup biz, purchase property or land, or even stay on there?

With this behind them, why are they crowing from top of the posts about a simple issue of Mumbai for Maharashtrians?

I’ll call this 370 degrees of hypocrisy. And a fat slap on the faces of people who chose to invest their votes in them.

This is the second time that one of the best known figures that India looks up to and reveres, has come out in the open and said his bit regarding what he thinks about the MNS motto in life. The person who dumped MNS concepts before Mukesh Ambani was India’s God of Sport, Sachin Tendulkar. Sachin had also openly expressed his thoughts that he is an Indian first, then a Maharashtrian or Mumbaikar.

Raj Thackeray arguably, could not really do anything at that time. He was a friend to Tendulkar, was the funda loudly proclaimed and accepted at that time. However, wisdom in not responding or making a scene about it was the larger picture. Sachin, who India reveres as an Idol for generations to emulate and rise up to in terms of capability and cult levels, is placed far, far above the MNS. Leave alone for the nation, this holds true for Maharashtrians in general, and Mumbaikars specifically. A single slur or outcry against Sachin Tendular would have seen public favor go away from MNS, Marathi or not. Rank and file would have edged, stormed and walked their way outta the MNS into wider open spaces. For cricket is one area across the Indian Diaspora, that does NOT tolerate politicians interfering with their Gods.

And now comes Mukesh Ambani into the picture.

Ranked in the top notches as far as list of world’s richest people go. Head honcho of the largest org that India has ever seen. Owner of the Mumbai Indians franchise (Tendulkar is Captain here, too). Arguably, the largest employer that Mumbai and Maharashtra has today.

This is a good time for people to see whether the MNS is truly convinced in their cause, or wish to just rabble rouse.

Any cause that people hold to their hearts, cares not for status, popularity and other things. Causes are people. People are causes. One man may believe in something and take his belief to the skies in terms of acceptance and popularity cuz he believes in it hugely enough.

Will MNS actually dare take on the commercial and industrial might of an Ambani and the clout of a Tendular combined? They should, if they so seriously believe in their cause.

Instead of harassing and making life miserable for people who can’t even defend themselves, the MNS should actually take “panga” against people like this who with one word could turn their entire follower clan inside out. That will prove that they are actually concerned and serious about the cause that they propagate with so much vim, vigor and gusto.

Go Raj and MNS. And fight Ambani if you have the balls. Throw him and his industry out if you dare. Cuz when he says that he doesn’t care for your thoughts, the hundreds of thousands of people, Marathi or not, will stand by him. Entire environs that he buys and sells from will be with him. Obviously, he provides them the means to run their homes and businesses, not you. And believe you me, Ambani saying this is a far bigger threat for you than a poor taxi/auto driver not learning Marathi through the books you’ve thrown at them.

I’d like to actually see that you care, Raj and MNS. And I will believe you, if you go and whack an Ambani or a Tendulkar.

All subject of course, to you caring enough. You may of course, continue what you’re doing and keep whacking poor people who can’t defend themselves against you.

Post a brilliant overdose of yesterday’s leftovers and todays right-unders from my dabba kindly walloped together into 1 sq ft of vertical space without mixing and overflowing into each other,  I came across a tweet that mentioned that women (and in some cases men) are updating their FB status with color(s) of their bra, underwear, or err… nothing. Bluddy guaranteed to make the staidest or weirdest of us sit up and take note I guess. I promptly went out to all my followers list and popped an eyeball at the status mesg update feed there. Wonder o Wonders, nearly all, all of ‘em had updated their statuses with colors.

Drool !!

And then the twitter dams opened up to tweets, catcalls, witticisms and all brouhaha! Check these out

@rameshsrivats Censored scene in Deewar Parveen:Mere paas gaadi hai, bungalow hai, tere paas kya hai. Neetu: Mere paas bra hai

@thecomicproject : Asian Paints could tie up with a bra maker & promote breast cancer awareness .. girls with a mischievous look saying “mera wala red”/colours

@bombaylives: Pantone Colors is next

@manuscrypts: tweets abouts ze bra crossing limits!!

@fartingpen: One needs to overcome brariers in life

I don’t think I have ever, ever been so excited to hear about bra-episodes, even during those amazing, acne-filled, teen years of mine. This probably has been the best bra-gging that the women of the world and the bra have done for themselves. They have broken down bra-rriers that existed, in the mind probably, and the twitter world as one, starts speaking words about cup, words that never, ever slip via the lips.

Bra-Zeal is in #umbra should roll

At the onset, let me offer you my heartiest congratulations on the Talk For India Campaign launched by you.

In this campaign, you exhort all Idea users to use phone between the hours of 8:36 PM and 9:36 PM to make voice calls. Also, you mention that all “kamai” (in Hindi) or in English “NET INCOME” from all voice calls originating from Idea Numbers within India will be contributed towards procuring safety gear for the police force.

A very laudable Idea indeed, I must say.

However, I would like clarifications on the following points :

1) What NET INCOME do you talk about? I would love to know what it actually translates to as a percentage per rupee.

2) I notice in your ad that you mention over 5 Crores of user base. While I laud this following and strength, and I wish success that ALL your customers call, I  would like to know whether your networks have been looked into sufficiently well enough, to ensure that that kind of traffic can be managed and handled well enough for you to achieve sufficiently good revenues to hand over to the police force.

3) You mention police force, but do not talk about what state. I of course would love you to go all out and say Police Force, State of Maharashtra.

4) I further wish that your T&C (Terms and Conditions Page) http://www.talkforindia.co.in/terms_condition.html were drafted a wee bit better, and didn’t contain the following points :

a) The process and time of disbursing the amount shall be solely at the discretion of Idea.

b) The time and manner of contribution will be decided solely by Idea.

The above, to my un-enlightened capabilities, is suggestive of nothing further being planned other than this extremely exciting campaign of yours.

And last but not the least, remember, dear Team Idea, that the 26/11 tragedy still rankles deep within our breasts as a smouldering particle. It’s not fully ashes for most of us. I and I may go so far as to say WE, would really hate it if this emotion of ours was used towards commercial gain in any manner.

I, a citizen of India, laud you for this initiative, and request you to please come out into the open and provide audited results of this campaign of yours, including calls made during that hour, NET INCOME (still don’t get this bit or amount) generated, and lastly, amount distributed, to Who, When and Where.

I beseech all citizens of India to visit and spread the word of the IDEA Talk for India Campaign here :

http://www.talkforindia.co.in/

and to also requese IDEA to come out in an extremely transparent manner as to the audited results of this campaign, as a way to thank all those who support Idea in this campaign.

Sanjeev Sarma

This is the sound of inevitability. On 30th December, 2009, bridges will appear across mobile service providers. Bridges, that for a princely toll fee of Rs. 19, allow you to transition from one mobile service provider to another.

And if all happens as planned, this is one of the most disruptive events that would have ever happened to the Indian Telecom sector since the Mobile Boom. The Indian Mobile Market spaces would be free of monopoly from service providers, who hold you to ransom over prices and schemes for the very simple reason that you cannot move away from them without losing your mobile number.

I personally have been a very, very early adopter of Mobile Services. And ever since I picked up a number, I have been with a single co, that has changed its business avatar as Orange, HutchMax, Vodafone and so on. A single mobile number has been printed on hundreds of thousands of visiting cards, websites, contact forms, proposals etc, and has been unleashed across industries, sectors, people, domains where I ply or intended to ply, or intend to ply, my business. In a good number of cases, it has paid off. Calls made to potential customers 3 years ago, have resulted in orders even last week.

I have stuck on to a single service provider, whatever be the cost, worries, joys, encumbrances, headaches, promises not met, commitments over-fulfilled and so on.

I am now happy, that this enforced “stickiness” will be done away with, leaving me with the choice, at an extremely affordable rate of Rs. 19 per change too, of shifting to another provider who offers better pricing, quality of service, higher level of customer responsiveness, and so on.

I am finally a number free, not bound. 30th Sept, shall set me free.

Sanjeev Sarma

ps. As I write this, my numb brain explores various vistas and avenues of changes this could mean to market places and spaces. Hope I’m not too lazy to document them.

The poster people of Mumbai.

For them, the world is an eyeball. And every wall that can take their size of communication is an asset. Religion holds no bar for them, neither does locality or status of residents. This army works mainly through the night when they can do their deed unhindered, unnoticed and slips away at the first peep of dawn.

No area is too far away, no wall, however already cluttered is to be spared. They work for ridiculous rates, involving only labor and the cost of gum they prepare of wheat and other things that are discarded. The pastes they prepare for gluing their posters is stronger and more resilient than most brands that claim such awesome powers of bonding and adhesiveness.

The question is, can they, who do this to make money for people who look to advertise for extremely CHEAP rates, be called vandals?

I think not.

The recent case of the wallproject (#wallproject on twitter) has had me raising eyebrows, not for anything other than the fact that these poster plasters are called vandals. Face it … they can’t afford hoardings, they can’t afford to buy or lease media. They way they see it, they’re just adding color to otherwise peeling, unmaintained facades that proliferate in Mumbai city.

For me, these posters are not the problem. Believe you me, there are areas in Mumbai, walls and facades, that would look really, really horrible without them.

But then, they chose to do it on the #wallproject.

So you, a busy tax payer have spent a day indulging in your painting skills, and demand compensation for this labor and all else going waste cuz someone slapped his poster on the space you painstakingly painted.  So what if its commercial in its own way? (I remember this amazing pict that said ‘absolut mumbai’ … isn’t that advtg too?)

Methinks the idea isn’t to punish this industry. The idea however, is to hold those to task that use up public property wantonly through this media, and pay nothing for it at all. The wall publicist, who is told “chaap do ye is shaher ke chappe chappe mein” is not to be blamed for his miniscule rate of Rs. 2 per poster sticking, but the production house is.

Grab ‘em, make ‘em pay Rs. 100 per poster per day even. And employ the poster pasters … the Govt would be doing a far, far better thing that it has ever done before.

For note, we can’t do without posters on some walls walls that our current municipalities and govts are too “poor” to notice or maintain.

Very cleverly positioning himself as a “mole within IPL, armed with a MacBook Pro” etc, he has lead the online junta by their noses. Not naming any direct names, he has used clever behavioral metaphors to build convincing maps to real life personnas.

Wednesday, today, is the day he has promised to reveal himself to a whopping followership of over 7000 net junkies, cricket lovers etc. The world probably is hitting his blog crazy every minute, wanting to be the first to get this revelation of a man who has turned the world of media, audiences, and so on, followers to the most highly valued game in the Indian sub-continent, into a bunch of sheep, bleating and pleading, pleading, for his next cheesy, raunchy post.

His disclaimer is loud and clear. That all “All characters appearing in this work (blog) are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental and unintentional.“.

So that’s good enough to exonerate him from most libel claims that people might be trying to pin onto him. His use of words like IPL, or Mumbai Indians etc, will really not land him in the soup. After all, any author can weave a story around an event right and call it a “work of fiction” and get away with it, right? Dan Browne got away with using the word “POPE” in his Angels and Demons and got away with it.  Jeffrey Archer has used White House characters, and gotten away with it.

So why not FakeIPLPlayer?

What has he done that’s libelous? Nothing at all … He has not really stated what team he belongs to beyond providing clever metaphors and event tracks to lead the people on.

I also think that rather than harm, this blog has boosted IPL ratings to some extent. I for one, have gone back to see characters, especially to connect their supposed metaphors with the original and have a good laugh. The FakeIPLPlayer has not really done an Equation saying X player = X nick. For example, “a former test cricket player, who will always remain a former test cricket player” is the kind of leading on that one is talking about.

Appam Chu**ya has been the STAR of this blog. This nick has caught fancies of millions with immediate connections to a player who has a darned high irritant recall due to what public calls kiddish antics and weird behaviour.

I think the FakeIPLPlayer is a brilliant author in the making, aware of literary turns of expressions, and more importantly, aware of the fine line between pure fun, and libellous slander. He ROCKS.

There is no way anyone can pin a libel action on him, IMO.

Sanjeev Sarma

I can’t resist blogging competition. Gives me another excuse to spout a ton of Gibberish in this, my own space.

So when I was invited by @peppysophia to write about this Online Social Shopping Experience, I was quite excited. The reasons for this are two fold

1) The Social Shopping space excites me. It’s very close to me, especially since I dabble in a concept called sCRM (Social CRM) and love mining a huge amount of feeds to trend and track conversations around a brand and a product.

2) This is a darned contest And I’ve not won one so far, and Sophia Amma promised me that chances are darned bright and whatever I fell for this.

Now for the crux. The contest involves blogging about the ShopCorn “Social Shopping Site”.

I went through the presentation here, and was frankly, not a weee bit excited by what they had to throw at me. Not that the site or concept is tacky, but that I am too steeped in dreams and aspirations of things “social” to see any value in what they bonked at me in the presentation.

They spoke about various things to do online together, like Live Reviews, Browsing Deals, etc etc that didn’t really appeal to me. For me, most good shopping sites already do these things.

I couldn’t see the “social” bit in this entire blasted exercise.

The site is done well. But then, that in itself ain’t Social. Social means much much more than what this site offers.

For me, I would say that it would make darned good sense for a site like this to start off as a simple FB or Twitter app, and then scale up to a full site.

Concept? Good. Implementation? Damp Squib

Sanjeev Sarma

The journalist, as seen in a CNN-IBN video here, missed the Home Minister by less than 2 inches when he threw his shoe at Chidambaram. PC was, in his typical calm and suave way, asking the journo to shut up and not pursue a thread of conversation, when the fuse blew and the shoe flew.

Blogosphere, as usual is abuzz with this !

One of the blogs that stood out for sheer value add to the extremely amazing incident that has left fodder for the entire news grapevine to takeup and start buzzing is Monologue of a Nomad

With this incident, PC joins the exalted list of leaders who have had shoes thrown at them, including Ex-Prez George Bush. Loved the way PC conducted himself post the event though.

Would love to meet Jarnail Singh of Dainik Jagran (as reported here) to understand why he blew his fuse, and why this particular action, instead of a walk out, or whatever.

Who say’s life’s not happening, guys?

Sanjeev

Read all about it here

Cheers

Sanjeev Sarma